Movie Review

Movie Review: Grand Masti

There are some movies that shouldn’t be made and some, that do not need a sequel. This movie falls under both of them.
Director: Indra Kumar (check out the list of movies he directed. You’ll know what to expect.)
Producers: Ashok Thakeria, Indra Kumar (hope they really suffer serious losses, so they do not produce any more of such movies!)
Writers: Milap Zaveri, Tushar Hiranandani (Where was the writing? Couldn’t see any.)
Riteish Deshmukh as Amar (Ritesh, please stop acting, do something else. Politics, maybe?)
Vivek Oberoi as Meet (Dear Salman Khan, please kill this guy. Why the poor black buck?)
Aftab Shivdasani as Prem (he makes Jacky Bhagnani and Uday Chopra and other failed actors feel good about themselves.)
Sonali Kulkarni as Ritesh’s wife (stick to Marathi movies, please. This Bollywood debut ended your career before it even began!)
Manjari Fadnis as Aftab’s wife (her role in ‘Jaane Tu ya Jaane na’ was good. Why this, now?)
Karishma Tanna as Vivek’s wife (should stick to TV soaps. Why, why this movie?)
Maryam Zakaria as Rose (the hot teacher fantasy!)
Bruna Abdullah as Mary (The only good thing about the movie. Bakwaas acting but… You know!)
Kainaat Arora as Marlo (you will know from her entry as to why she was chosen for this movie!)
Suresh Menon as Hardik (totally downplayed. This guy’s comic timing is well-known but the dialogues don’t do justice.)
Pradeep Rawat as Robert Pereira (the hot-headed principal, bakwaas role!)
Music Director: Anand Raj Anand, Sanjeev Darshan (ye gaane sunne ke pehle mere kaan kyun nahi phat gaye?)
Cinematographer: Rituraj Narain (should be cursing himself for accepting this job!)
Editor: Sanjay Sankla (should have done a better job and made the movie only about Bruna Abdullah!)
Distributor: Maruti International (these guys are the reason this movie is in every theater. Find them and beat them!)
Do you have that one person in your life who forwards you non-veg jokes one after the other? Well, the makers of this movie have one such person too. They decided to put all those forwards together and made a movie out of them. That is Grand Masti for you. Every non-veg joke you possibly know put into one movie. The story is baseless, like the first movie. However, ‘Masti’ had some amount of originality. This one has nothing ‘grand’ or ‘fun’.

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Have you seen such a sight in your college days, EVER? If yes. please tell us the name of your college.

The story is about 3 married men, who get no action at home due to various circumstances, going back for a college reunion. There, they expect hot women wearing bikinis roaming around in the college premises (maybe due to an overdose of 90210 or some other teenage English flick/series). In reality, however, bikini is out of question. They, instead, come across fully-clothed women, some even in a burqa. There is no fun in college – no flirting, no romance, all because of an extremely strict principal. Makes you question if any of them ever went to an Indian college or university, for this is a normal sight everywhere, strict principal or not. However, their luck shines as all three leads are miraculously introduced to hot women. Vivek meets his once-upon-a-time fan who wasn’t hot in college but is extremely curvy now (Kainat Arora), Aftab meets his hot teacher (who seduces him too, Madam Rose) and Ritesh meets a random girl (who happens to be the principals daughter, Bruna Abdullah. Lucky, right?). They all have some “masti” at the principal’s house, until he knocks the door. Turns out, while Aftab is with Rose, the khadoos principal’s wife, Riteish is with Mary, his daughter and Vivek is Marlo, his sister. Their names, if spoken in a sequence, become Rose, Mary, Marlo (this is a joke repeated a thousand times!). To make matters worse, the wives of all three men come along and the rest is about how they have a hard time handling the situation.
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Do such scenes still make you laugh? If yes, you may like the movie. If no, your reaction will be more like mine!

I’ve watched porn movies with better storylines than this one. Some would say this one is a revolutionary movie which crosses all boundaries (American Pie, Euro Trip, etc.). However, unlike those, this one has nothing to boast about. The story is sad, the jokes are all known (Whatsapp and sms jokes shouldn’t be used in movies) and the acting, a hundred times worse. Bold humour or not, this is humour that would make only a teenager laugh (but who won’t be allowed in theaters for it’s an A grade movie, so no one really enjoys it). The music and the songs are as forced as the humour and silliness overshadows all the explicit content. I won’t even get to how each actor capable of doing good roles (seriously, look at the cast. They may not be good actors but not so bad either!). If you’re one to not have known the world of non-veg sms or don’t know how to make efficient use of your hard disk (yes, you know what I’m talking about here), you may enjoy this flick. Also, please remember I haven’t watched exceptional movies in the last few days, yet this one tops the list of pathetic. It outdoes Chennai Express and Nasha. Even my fascination for Bruna couldn’t make me love this one.
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Did you watch the whole movie for me? You poor, lovable, dumb admirer!!

It’s better to download this one on torrent (do not waste money on buying a DVD either). In my opinion, don’t waste your download usage too on this one. I would suggest you not watch it in theaters, especially not with a woman! More so, if it is your first meet in a long time. One wonders about its amazing box office collections and it being declared a HIT by many. HIT them, maybe!

Disclaimer: If you think the content here is explicit and degrading, the movie is a lot worse. Writing a review of this compels one to use such language. Apologies if your innocence is lost!